Anti Fur!!!

A very appalling video indeed. Have mercy on those animals...

Malaysia Election 2008

To many, 8th March 2008 is the day that they decide on their leader.

To me, it was just another Saturday for me - waking up early in the morning to work, followed by assignment discussion with Fang in college. Not to mention the extra activity we did after that haha... By the time I got back to Klang, it was already almost 5pm, so I just decided not to vote since I won't make it in time anyway. Off I went to Hc's place and hung out there till late evening. His dad came home and told what his friend said "I always pay tax - income tax n everything, n they still wanna increase the price. Heck! I'll vote for opposition!" Haha...

When i got home, my parents weren't home yet. Actually, I was supposed to help out at ACS cos I got tricked by my dad to hand in my info to help them out. Substitute, it seems... He even said that I won't have much to do... Then i realized that they were always in need of help during election and my job included checking and counting the votes! Gosh! I felt so duped! Well, I came back late from college, so i didn't go in the end.

By the end of the day, I received news that all my parents network in the MCA suffered a terrible blow. None had won. Some crashed badly! Not only those in Klang, even those in Subang, PJ, even as far as Johor and Penang. My parents were devastated with the loss, not cos they're pro MCA, just that they find it a handicap to not have Chinese representatives anymore - no more Chinese Ministers to stand up for our race. True, election doesn't only involve voting for those who can serve the people, it also involves voting for those who can stand for our rights compared to other opponents who may not have access to such opportunities. Anyways, this election isn't about the candidates, it's more about the parties. I guess people have "taken" enough of the government's "concern", so instead of choosing a party that has been stable through out the years, they opted for other alternatives who have given words to work a few hundred times better.

Results will be officially out tmr. Let's see whether this is worth gambling for the next 5 years...

25th Wedding Anniversary present - Family Photo Shoot at the Bridal Gallery

Sharing a few pictures in the albums...

1. Wedding Photo in white bridal gown
(My dad took better pictures when he wasn't looking at the camera. Seriously...)

2. Wedding photo in Chinese Traditional gown
(I really wanted this picture to be placed at our living room but my dad, due to his ego I think, wanted a more formal picture)

3. Family photo I
(Notice my younger brother's eyes looking elsewhere)

4. Family Photo II
(This is soooo like the "Tang Som Fong Pou" - TVB drama family portrait. Haha!)

5. Siblings photo
(Notice my younger brother's shoes are slightly too big... cos the shoes weren't his to begin with!)

6. Family photo III
(My elder brother looks like he's motivated to reach the yearly sales quota! Haha!)
7. Family Portrait IV

8. Family Portrait V
(Notice that I'm taller... I was standing on a piece of wood...)

9. Family Portrait VI

10. Family Portrait VII
(My dad's pants a little too short?!)

11. Family Portrait VIII

There were of course more pictures taken and I don't intend to put them all here in my blog. Drop by my house if you're interested to see more. Despite the minor errors every now and then, we were all satisfied with the outcomes of the photos.

P/s - Now I know what to expect when I take my wedding pics in the future. *giggles*

Many blog ENTRIES in a blog ENTRY... updated...

Yes... Yes... Again, I have yet to update my blog. I really really have to buck up. Should put it into my list of Year 2008 resolution haha...

Let's start with wishing everybody a "Happy New Year". May Year 2008 welcome the best of events for all! As for me, I'm looking forward to a deeper understanding of myself and knowing what's best for me in all aspects including my career, hopefully... Other than that, may my love life with Mr. Right sail smoothly. Of course, may my family members be healthy and wise (haha)...

Well, Let's begin with my 1st post:

15th Dec to 17th Dec 2007 - Family Trip to Cameron with other families

Going back to Cameron after a few years was a refreshing experience. The last time I've been there was during my psych camp with Yi, Fang and Val before we left for the States. Moreover, the place that we stayed in this time was nearby the hostel that we previously stayed in. I remember that there was an incident where this boy at the camp went drunk on the last night (alcohol was a No-no!) and those who were involved in it, including those who saw or heard had a small meeting the next day. It was quite a group psychology kinda experience... Anyways, I had a chance to rewear my BSU sweatshirt and it proved its quality and purpose as warmth was exactly what it provided me with. Unfortunately, I had a great fall down the stairs on the 1st evening when we were all excited to go to their nigth market. Actually, it was already a 2nd fall caused by the same heels that made me slip once at my mom's office's stairs. The sole has already lost its "flower" haha... So, again I slipped, and this time a harder fall. It was darn painful but I had to pretend that it was no big deal as it was only the first day and I didn't want my parents to be worried sick. Next thing I knew, I had a big bruise on my left knee and a bigger bruise (bigger than my palm size) on my left thigh. My sis deleted the picture but I still managed to save 1 in my phone.

One memorable thing was our trip to the Boh Tea Plantation. The journey into the plantation was an eye-opener indeed. It was only 2km deep but it took us about 30 minutes to get in due to the narrow and winding road. Some parts of the road, actually most parts of it, were meant only for a single car to pass. So, we had to give and take when we saw other cars coming from the opposite direction. The view was breath-taking! Really an amazing experience! Going into the plantation was OK but coming out was worse! It started raining somewhat heavily and cars just kept coming in. I was quite pissed cos why were the cars coming in at 4pm when the place closes at 4.30pm, plus it was raining?! Anyways, we got stuck at this one part of the road when it was totally stuck - too narrow a road and cars from both sides. Then, there was this "smart" man who came down and knocked on our window to move on when he couldn't even see what was happening in front. He thought we were stuck cos we didn't dare to drive down further. Gosh, such shallow minded! Thank god we managed to get out of there alive and well. I was also worried for my parents at the same time cos their car was bulkier than ours (comparing a Mercedes and an Innova) and they came out later, alive and well too...

It was a nice trip overall and almost all our meals were home prepared, as in the aunties brought and bought food there to cook. However, the bomb dropped on the last day when I woke up in the morning feeling really bad about my tummy and I ended having a bad time in the toilet. Once before breakfast, again after breakfast and another while going down Cameron. Can you imagine going down the winding mountain with no toilet to be found? I had to hold my stomach for about 30 minutes. At one point when I thought I couldn't hold it any longer, I just told my brother to stop at the next orang asli house for me to borrow their toilet (which is like a small atap house). Lucky for us, there was a small sundry shop while going down and I thought I saw this public stop next to it. So, instead of going into the sundry shop I insisted on going to the public toilet (duh!) but guess what? The public toilet turned out to be a surau. Haha! And yes, I ended up doing my business in the surau's toilet. Not only me, so did my sis and younger brother. Haha...

24th & 25th Dec - Christmas Eve & Christmas
To make things short and simple, my Christmas Eve and Christmas day were spent with my darling boyfriend (of course!) and Christmas Eve was quite a memorable one cos it was his cousin's wedding day. The bridegroom and bride were both young and they looked so nice together. The bride's from Ipoh and she's so darn pretty. They had a live band performance (those that you see in pubs) and almost everything was in English (cos they had English education background). Took quite a lot of pictures that night too. Will be uploading them up on facebook once I get them from hc.

12th Jan Parents' 25th Wedding Anniversary Present - Bridal Album

This is a special entry. My sis and I scouted around for the best package and we found one near the KO specialist (near the closed Ocean). The lady was very experienced and she knew exactly what we wanted. Btw, D* Va* Bridal Gallery had really good designs but they were tooooo expensive, too far from our allocated budget. So for anyone who has enough budget and you're interested to take quality modern pictures, you can try that shop. Not to say that I wasn't satisfied with our shop - they took really good pictures and we had a variety to choose from. The picture taking day took about 5-6 hours and my parents were dead tired. My dad lost focus and just couldn't manage to give a single smile anymore. The photographer was good. He made us do a lot of poses and had his own ideas of the best positions. The only thing was, he was too straight forward a person - he can be damn blunt at times. Anyways, the outcomes were satisfying. Everyone liked the photos and they came out great!

Sept '07 semester finally ended...Part 2

First semester of Masters of Counseling officially ended on 10th December! Actually the exams ended on 5th Dec but Dr.Goh extended the assignment due all the way to the 11th Dec. Anyways I finished it a day earlier and had a half day of shopping in Bangsar with my sis and my mom the next day. It was heck jam in KL, especially with the heavy rain. My dad was super pist already cos he was the one who fetched us all the way there... Oops...

I have no idea whether I'll manage to score well for my Development paper cos I only prepared for 2 essays when I was supposed to prepare for 3 essays. Not that I didn't do extra preparation, it's just that the extra turned out to be the wrong chapter. I only had the last 10 minutes to prepare for my 3rd exam, which was a confirmed No-no. So, I went in unprepared and just crapped whateva I could think of for my third essay. Cross my fingers that I won't score that bad!!!

My new sem's gonna start on the 2nd week of January and I'm still juggling my time with work and studies. I don't know how long I can cope with the hecticness. However, I do intend to let go my job to find another to accommodate to my studies very very soon, probably before CNY. Will have to think about it thoroughly during the upcoming holidays next week. Yup, I have about 10 days Christmas break next week. Kinda cool... Hehe...

Sept '07 semester almost... at end...Part 1

Why did I say that the semester is almost at end although I've finished my finals last Monday and Wednesday? Well, I have one more assignment/ essay to hand in next Monday and I'm not even halfway through. I think I'm the type that works better under pressure but I know I have to overcome that weakness considering that I'm super prone to stress.

I had my presentation for Development Accross Lifespan on 28th Nov (Wed) and it was quite a long draggy yet funny experience. I was informed that the presentation for each group was roughly 10 minutes, and only 1 presenter for each group. So, Fang and I made a deal and she would prepare the power point, and I present our paper. Un/ Fortunately for us, we were the last group to present. Now, this was both the draggy and funny part. The first group had everyone presenting and it took about 20 minutes. The following group too had everyone presenting and it dragged on for 30 minutes. The third group, however, only had 1 presenter and it took about 30 minutes also. The 4th had all presenting and it dragged all the way to 40 minutes. Break was after that. I took the chance to ask how the presentation was supposed to be and they replied saying 15-20 minutes per group and optional for number of presenters. I was like SHIT! 15-20 minutes?! All I prepared was for 10 minutes. How the hell was I going to drag? Then, I felt slightly comforted that the other 2 groups said theirs were very short and needed to be dragged longer but I soon found out that their claims were untrue. They took about 20 minutes to finish. At last, it was out turn. The funny part was only the lecturer knew of our group's existence, our fellow mates didn't! They started packing at the end of the 2nd last group and were surprised to see us preparing! They even apologized for not noticing us. Haha...

Our topic was on HUMOR, so, i started the presentation with a "sex" joke:

A 90-yr old man announced his intention to marry a 30-yr old girl. After being advised by many, he finally went to the hospital.
The old man told the medical officer, "My friends and family told me to have my body checked, esp my sex organs, when I told them that I was going to marry a young lady."
The medical officer said, "OK then. Show me your sex organs."
The old man stuck out his tongue and showed his middle finger.

My joke was pretty simple, though a little inappropriate... Unfortunately, less than a quarter of the class understood our joke. I remember seeing a man putting his thumbs up and saying good joke! Haha... I think I did well for the presentation. I felt good after it, at least. The good thing was our presentation probably left a recency effect on the listeners. Plus, it was time to go home - everyone was obviously awake by then. Haha...

That was the end of all my classes this Sept '07's semester!

~Happy Birthday To Me~

Tanti auguri a te
Tanti auguri a te
Tanti auguri a te
Tanti auguri a te.... (Birthday song in Italian)

Congratulations to me!

I would like to thank all of you who wished on this aupicious day. Thank you very much!

Unfortunately, for me, I've lost my sweet voice on my birthday. My present, that's what my mom said...

Also, I got an mc to rest at home.

Don't even know whether it's good or bad news... Haha...
Sick on birthday?! Not working on birthday?!

*Coughing badly as I'm blogging*

Occupational hazard, maybe?

Anyways... thanks again!

p/s - To dearest Darling, remember to compensate o! Haha...

Coping with work and studies...

Where is the pressure coming from? Time management would probably be my biggest problem. I suppose every minute counts. There aren't a lot of assignments but they're definitely big assignments, involving much research and continuous thinking, of course not forgetting the ever paraphrasing, citation and referencing. Constant studying and revising, which I hardly have the time to do...

My days of classes are very tiring, usually waking up with puffy eyes the next day. I don't sleep very late. I try to get about 7-8 hours of sleep everyday but I'm still tired...

I remember during the last assignment due, I was practically dead. Hardly concentrating or contributing to my job. I had a bad headache attack, nausea etc. Bad bad working week. Totally not on par...

Let's see how I'll fare during the next assignment due which one is exactly on the day of finals while the other is a week before finals.

I don't know how well I can cope for long...

Another century...

I don't even remember the last time that I logged in and posted a blog. The thing is that I'm quite sensitive towards facing the monitor for a whole long period of time. So, I tend not to stay online for long. Only comes online when I need to e.g. finding pictures for kids.

Anyways, I'm still working in Cosmotots. Yes, I still am. Have not left after almost 3 months. By the end of this week, I'll be a confirm (hopefully...)
Recently, mentors have had their classes rotated, including myself of course and I'm still adapting. I would say, not very good at it though because the kids are much wilder. Then again, there are those few who just happens to grip you unintentionally. I have a "favorite" kid in every class of mine. And one of my favorites is a chubby 5 yr old boy, who's super smart and cute and innocent yet mischievous. Got to understand that he's still a kid, so it's good to preserve some childlikeness in him. It's just so hard to resist his "attractiveness". All that innocence. I remember having the kids compete to finish a task of finding things in the class and I mentioned I wanted 3 pieces of rubbish. However, not being able to get any, this boy just grabbed the dustbin and brought it all the way front for me to check. Haha... Smart eh? He's also a thinking boy who has once asked me about why do humans exist even after the dinosaurs have extinct? I seriously had trouble answering that or did I just evaded his question? Haha... He talked about the altantuya case as well to my colleague. Told you he was smart! Love smart kids who just blow me off!

I've also recently resumed my Masters in Counseling Psychology in HELP. Although it has only been a mere 2 weeks, I could feel the "difference" between the Malaysian and American's education system. Somehow, I felt that my senior yr as an undergraduate was more independent compared to my masters program now. It could just be me being all bias etc. Or it's understandable that half the class didn't have background in psych, so, there's still a lot of lecturing. I'm not discriminating. In a way, it's good because it refreshes what we've learnt before, especially 90% of it would be buried deep in the memories already. As usual, Dr.Goh's class is still as captivating as before. As for the other, I don't really want to comment much. She's an experienced person and probably an expert at what she does, but I would assume not in lecturing. Sometimes, Fang and I would feel that her examples aren't very "accurate". Not that they're inaccurate, it's just that they're phrased inappropriately. It would have been easier to understand if they were phrased otherwise... Well, I do not want to be the person poking at her everytime during class. So, it's sometimes a dilemma of whether to approach or not. Maybe it's just good that we act deaf-mute once in a while. Did going overseas made a difference in my sense of assertiveness? In my opinion, it most likely did... May not be useful all the time, but I'm glad I acquired this skill, doesn't matter whether I got it from US or Malaysia...

Btw, I had a haircut too last, last Saturday. A really short one, somewhere around my neck - bangs haircut. I've had mixed reactions. My kids really dislike it (almost all said ugly, kids say the darnest thing!) buy I've got adults who said that it suited me well. Hc hates it nonetheless, haha... It'll grow, don't worry...

Nowadays, my life revolves around work, work and study... My colleagues are my circle of friends. I miss my friends. Thinking about what Hc said yesterday, it's actually quite true that besides him being my main solitary person to confide in, there's hardly anyone now that I really communicate to. Not saying that I've shut myself away from people, it's just that I don't share with people as much as I used to anymore. Probably cos I don't hang out with friends as much as I used to anymore.

Life goes on...

Ultimate goal in life: To become a siu lai lai whose main responsibility revolves around bringing up my own kids.

Hehe...

~A Battle of Piano in Secret~

Beautiful battle! Really salute both of them! Sadly the video's a bit "jerky"... Do not doubt it! It's Jay playing the pieces!

Long long update...

It's been more than a month since I last visited my own blog. Not that I was super duper busy... Just that I'm so sensitive towards facing computers nowadays that I'm worried I'll get headache whenever I face the cumbersome monitor. Hc has just recently diagnosed me with tension headache which is related to inability to release stress, therefore, resulting in bad headache...

For updates...

I'm currently working in a Child Centre in Klang. It's not a kindergarten, neither is it a tuition centre. It focuses mainly on English and kids come to expand their minds (I hope...) Have been working there for only a month. Still learning about their teaching methods. Still undergoing training at the moment. But training is always on, I think...

There, I get to see and experience different type of kids, from good to bad, cute michievous to horribly mischievous, almost any type, I would say. There's of course my pretty boy there. I think I consciously or unconsciously pay more attention to him. Haha... But he is one good and smart boy, so I guess no harm done. There are those who just get on your nerve. I was told that I'm fierce. Well, I expect highly from the kids, always pushing them to strive for the best, trying to bring their potential out. Sounds really idealistic right? Haha... Kids who don't put in effort really annoys me. I know they can do more but it's like they're giving up without even trying. It's fun and interesting but when things don't go the way I think they're supposed to (that's when the kids get on my nerves), it's really frustating. But I'll be ok after that. It's just during class where I need to be flexible and adapt to various situations, especially when every kid is different...

Besides work, I intend to continue my studies soon. In what? None other than counseling psychology. Really considered clinical psychology but course not offered in Malaysia. If anyone has any clue of where I can take up courses on art and play therapy, please please please do let me know!

Latte has improved in her potty training! So happy! Yay!

Resignation accepted

I have resigned... officially on the 17th June 2007.

I handed in my resignation letter on the 8th and I worked till 17th. By right, it was a one week notice but I voluntereed to work till the 17th because I felt that I needed to help where ever I can, at least until that Sunday's event.

Actually, I thought of handing in the letter on the 11th, after the ISO training but on the 7th, I was told to stay in the office and not attend the training for following up purposes (too many things to do). So, I made up my mind to give in earlier since there were no more training opportunities to attend.

I rushed to buy white envelopes that Friday morning, wanting to reach the office earlier than my manager. Opened her locked room and put right on top of her desk. At about 9++am, my manager called me and I knew what it was going to be about. The first thing she asked me was "Is it so tough working here?" I told her "Well, I'm not leaving because of the job, I'm leaving because of different interest". Then, we continued talking about my dreams and what I had in mind to do next etc. I told her that I intended to study (which I really do, but probably not till the intake is open haha... but for leaving purposes I had to bring forward the date that I would be starting my course - July? haha...) Anyway, we talked for a while and I just continued with my work soon after.

By lunch time, my manager asked me to have lunch together. I agreed and as expected, she tried persuading me to stay during that time. I was adamant to leave althought I did thought of staying to help part time till the event in July ends. She told me that Frankie (another manager) knows about my bomb and they were trying to think of ways to make me stay. Just shortly after that, my colleague messaged me, saying that my resignation news spread very fast and that people were asking him about it. The thing that made it funny was I handed in the resignation in the office and none knew except for both me and my manager. On the other side (training, which involves about 70% of the Office staffs) knew about it. How fast do rumours spread? Or in this case, true news spread? Haha...

My manager left about 3-4pm, leaving me alone in the office (alone as in my department). I really had nothing much to do besides updating the action plans and following up from time to time, or even coordinating finalized documents from the office and the training side. So, other colleagues and I chit chatted around while waiting for the clock to strike 6pm!

*Story to be continued...*

Shih Tzu at home...

I have a Shih Tzu at home!

Yes... Yes... I know how I use to say that my parents do not agree with having pets (besides fish) at home...

Well, I guess they agreed this time, thinking that we're old enough to take good care of our pet dog.

It all started with my younger brother, abi, who was super enthusiastic on getting a pet dog. He did quite a wholesome of research online, of what dog breed, etc. Showing them to my brother & mother every now & then, asking for opinions of which dog would be best.

Finally, he stumbled upon a friend whose friend is intending to sell off their pet Shih Tzu. He got detailed information and was very keen, bugging our lives almost everyday to proceed with keeping a pet dog.

So, I told him to prepare a proposal, with objectives & budget in it. Anticipate the risks that we're going to face. The poo, the pee, the food, the bacteria, the smell etc.

Abi was dead serious about it that he asked for a sample of proposal from me & so I did. I passed to him the proposals that I used for my work. Of course, he couldn't understand a few terms here & there e.g. collaterals, expenditures. Haha...

Anyway, he prepared one. Probably isn't the most proper & neatest of all but it was indeed good effort. He even added possible profit through selling of puppies in the "objective" part.

Not to forget, in my trip to Malacca to celebrate my grandma's birthday, we saw people exhibitioning & selling dogs at Jonker Street, which triggered us to feel like having one for ourselves.

After amending the proposal every now & again, we finally set last Sunday (10/06/07) to see the dog at his friend's friend's house. Upon seeing the dog & a little persuasion from the ex-owner & of course after negotiation of price & thorough understanding of the dog's "habits", our management (mom dearest) decided to go ahead with the idea.

So, now I have a "bitch" at home. haha... I know it sounds harsh...

I have a female dog at home. They initially named her Belle but we thought it sounded a little "ah lian/ liong". We changed her name to Latte, considering that she has white & brown color fur/hair. There were a few options before we finalized her name, from Toffey to Mocha to Cappucino. Haha...

Latte has gotten used to that name & she's quite tiao kae (jual mahal) at times. Also, she has not gotten over the potty training period. She still pees & poops around, which gets to everyone's nerves! She has gotten used to biting. Not good! Cos she broke my mom's vase while biting the plant's leaves. She played with the hiu lo (the thing to put the prayer's burning sticks - don't remember the term). Whenever, she bites around or leaves her mark behind, she gets scoldings & beatings from us allright, mainly from me, my sis & my mom (super!). Latte's one smart dog. She always show the sad, innocent, I'm sorry look when she knows she has done wrong & we're about to beat her... My maid is afraid of Latte. She runs when she saw Latte earlier & Latte thinking that my maid wants to play, ran after her! Haha...

Anyway, Latte's quietly sleeping in her cage now. WHen she's active, she can be all over the place. She hardly wants to sit in her cage. If we lock her, she'll start barking. However, when she's tired or lazy, she wouldn't even bother standing. She just lies down flat on the floor & enters her cage when we ask her to...

Vet pricing's not cheap... Brought her to trim her face hair (too long, poking her eyes) & it cost quite a bomb!

We're just obsessed with Latte!... For now... Haha...

Disappointed yet glad...

The news is out! ...

And yes... As expected... I failed...

What did I failed in? That is up to me to keep my peace...

Why did I fail? I know the reasons better than anyone else does...

Just wanted to express a little or two in my blog, that's all...

I wouldn't deny the disappointment having to know that I have not passed, after such a long wait and especially, during the last stage...

I am glad however...

Because I wouldn't want to get myself stuck in a dilemma, choosing between my interest and the "luxurious" income...

Maybe... I wasn't meant for corporate life...

Maybe... I was all the while looking for a simple life...

I just want to return to my roots... That is one thing that I'm sure of...

Thanks for those who supported me and who are still supporting me...

It's a blessing to know that so many people out there are always around when I need them...

Thank you again...

New resolution! New perspective!

After much advise & much thought... I've so far come to a new way of adjusting my life.

UOB's reply is gonna come in by coming Wednesday, to confirm whether I get the offer after almost 2 months' waiting & going through tests. In my personal opinion (seriously)... I won't get the offer cos I know how terrible i performed in the interview.
Reason 1: I was a little overconfident that I didn't do my pre-interview homework.
Reason 2: Overconfidence again cos I tot previous interviews may be good enough to prepare me for that interview.
Reason 3: Everyone's definition of easy is different (Not blaming anyone here).
Reason 4: I, myself, am not ready for that position - not ready for high management posts.
Reason 5: I fell for the interviewers' "interrogation". Not that they were mean or strict or anything, they're extremely nice ppl who are thinking from their point of view. So, its natural that the questions they ask make sense. Unfortunately, for me, there was a question or two that hit my most vulnerable points. Questions that even I, couldn't answer myself. What else could it be? My question of studying or working... Whether getting a Masters is something that I want so badly? DUH!! Where am I going to be in 10 yrs time? I know usually in interviews ppl can produce huha answers like I wanna be a big manager by that time etc. But it was very hard for me to portray myself in that way cos I think deep down inside me, I haven't seen that part of myself... It just hasn't crossed my mind do I wanna be in a high post 10 yrs down the road... Very subtle thoughts... The thing is I can't even see myself clearly in these 2-3 yrs time, how am I suppose to see myself in 10 yrs time? That was seriously, to me, an easy yet "poisonous" question... N stg to be told.. Towards the end of the interview in which I intended to thank the interviewers for sharing & letting me see further into the future (very very genuine thank u), I suddenly broke down... I just couldn't hold my self back... Well, according to Hc, the issue has been in my head for quite a while, so wheneva i talk about it, it easily leads on to emotions. So... there it goes... I've shown the interviewers the last thing that I should have... Understand now why i won't get the job?! Hahaha...

I've stayed on a principal for a while now - "If i don't believe in it myself, how am I suppose to persuade others to believe in it too?" But ppl have said that it isn't what I believe in. It is what the consumers or those who need it (e.g. product) to believe in it. It is true. I dont deny that. If not, the market will not prosper today. But even until now, it's very hard for me to accept this believe - the idea that it is what ppl want that matters...

Previous wednesday gave me a knock on the head. Advertising & promotions were discussed to encourage sales of our properties. THen there were profiles of young beautiful, posed-as-models girls who were to be the usherers for the upcoming event. I was like... What? THey use girls in car shows, phones, beers, n now properties?? Is it necessary? I tot it was the product that matters. Then again, the package presentation was important too. It is nonetheless one of the most useful marketing strategies used today. Its what the consumers are looking for, therefore, the usage of girls to promote sales. Not that It's wrong. Again, it's just what the ppl want. It got me into thinking... I've learned about stereotypes, critical thinking etc. N i know, yes, it works. But base on my knowledge, I should be reducing such stereotypes n not reinforcing them! As the new generation, can't we just use other strategies than to use such ideas? What happened to critical thinking? If i were ppl out there, I'd be thinking what has pretty girls got to do with houses? The more sociable they are, the better the houses. I can confirm there is no, ZERO correlation!
I talked to hc about this & he said if thats the way i think, there's hardly anyway that I can stay in the industry. I've spoken to Yi & she agreed that working in a field that goes against our own believes & values will make both, us & the company soar. "If i don believe in the strategy, How am i suppose to convince myself to use it?" I probably sound like a naive girl thrown into the realistic society but what the heck! Sad sad society... I saw a clearer picture to what I don't want... Sales & marketing is fun in the sense that I get to meet a lot of ppl, which suits my personality & what I like. Unless the product etc. is stg I believe in, or not I'm going to have a hard time convincing ppl to buy them...

So what am I to do for now? I scouting for universities to continue my masters. I've considered counseling or early childhood education. I'll have to do research on which university, what are the courses, what can I work as, financial, n part time working. I intend to study full time n work part time in a place that is related to my studies. For now, I've decided to stay in the company till June. After that, I'm a gone person! If I can, I'd rily like to leave now but there are so many events coming up in June n if I leave, my manager will be in deep shit & I pity my new colleague... So... Will stay till end of June.

Speaking about my manager... Gosh! It's a CHALLENGE to work under her. Seriously! There is much to say about her... I don wanna start being bitchy now but the comments are endless hahaha... I will surely talk about it when we see each other again - Klang jimuis etc. Or i might just blog about it discreetly hahah...

Previously, I tot i was trapped! But... No! I allowed myself to be trapped. I was afraid to step out, afraid of what ppl may think of me, afraid of responsibilites n burden... I'm glad that I've stepped out of the shell.. N i hope things will turn out great!

Aja Aja Fighting!

To do what I should or To do what I want?

Hey ppl... Back into blogging after quite a while...

What am I doing besides work, work & work? I've come to realize that work's one of the "boring-est" thing on earth... unless, that's unless, one has found the job of his or her dreams. In my case, sad to say, it is not my dream work. Then, some may say, 90% of the time, ppl end up doing work that has either nothing to do with their course or ppl just end up not doing the work of their dreams, be it the environment, job scope, bosses etc.

Why am I not satisfied?

Come to think about it, my job scope wasn't drawn out specifically. I know Miss Sze Ee has told me to keep an eye on this issue but I didn't understand her meaning well then. I totally get it now. I am suppose to be a Sales & Marketing Exec. Much to my surprise (or may be not), I'm doing 70% admin work now. From typing to photostating to emailing, even to MAKING MILO, I've done them all... Wondering why am I still staying there?

There are few reasons why:
1. If I leave, where am I to go after that? I have not secured myself any road ahead. So I don wanna quit without knowing my direction...

2. I don't wanna be judged as a person who can't withstand the "challenges" outside. I know very well that I can be good at my job, doesn't matter whether I like it or not. I'm a person that aims to excel in the things that I do (not boasting k...)

3. I'm being exposed to a lot of skills & knowlegde. My boss passes down a lot of things for me to, forcing me to learn things that I've never imagined I would know, sometimes beyond my capacity. I get a lot of exposure in my workplace.

Seriously... Deep down inside me... I wanna do something that is related to psychology... I MISS PSYCHOLOGY! Be it child, counseling, industrial, as long as i'm doing something close to psychology, I will have strong passion & enthusiasm towards it!

I wanna continue my studies, my masters but sometimes reality just suck! Financial's a problem... Deciding which Uni to go to is another problem... Deciding what do I wanna specialize in is also a problem...

I've heard comments that I suit sales or marketing or PR but I have yet to see myself flourish in those areas. May be cos I haven't been given such opportunities. At my current working place, there aren't much sales or marketing to do. By the way, I just found out that my job scope focuses on internal marketing (research & database updating) which wasn't what I was looking for in the 1st place. I wanted something outgoing, something exciting, something vibrant... N yet now, where have I landed myself into?

Almost every single time that I've talked to Hc about, almost every single time I'll ended up dropping a tear or two (should be more than that)...

I don't wanna give up... but I don't wanna do something that I don't enjoy doing...

Yesterday, I had a new perspective... I wanted to be the person up there, sharing my experience & motivating ppl through the knowledge & skills of psychology... The word that came into my mind was INFLUENCE... I want to make a difference in people's lives through psychology... The question is HOW?

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*LOST*

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Freestyle Dance : Mirror Story - Korea (Prepix)

Wanted to post this the other day but just couldn't make it through. Anyway, another cool dance by PREPIX! Watch out for the duplicate haha...

Fei Ni Mo Shu by Tank

Sweet sweet song... As always...

Done with University, moving on to the Society's school...

Hello everyone... I haven't been blogging for quite a while & here I am now, in my working place, blogging while my manager is away (she is on MC leave today)...

Anyway here are the updates... (quite a long blog)

GRADUATION:

I had a family photo session with my graduation robe on last Saturday evening (14.4.07). It was a memorable & meaningful one cos we've never had that opportunity in the past. I asked HC to come along, which he did. Hahahaa... It was fun cos we were required to post & smile, this n that... HC & I took 2 pictures together... One thing bad though.. I looked damn damn damn ROUND with my mortarboard on! Also, I didn't have my CUm Laude string with me..

THe official graduation was the very next day organized by HELP University College in Shangri La Hotel. I went in the morning with Yi n her parents. HC couldn't/ didn't want to come due to several reasons - expensive, troublesome, timing etc. Well, I gave him a choice of family photo or graduation n he chose the former. There were a lot of ppl, most with flowers in their hands along with a bear with a mortarboard in the bouquettes. My parents came later, only managed to see them after the whole ceremony (they were at teh guest seats). Sadly yet uniquely for us, there were only 3 students gaduating from BSU (Me, Yi & Sheila). During the group photo session, the VIPS were more than the students. Quite empty, sigh... Mr.Sunjay Phukan (i hope it's the right spelling) & Dr. Kong gave us the recognition & the cert. It wasn't as colorful the scene in comparison to BSU's graduation. BSU's lecturers were PhD levels n they had various patterns of robes, hoods & even mortarboards. But there were a few outstanding one in the HELP graduation - feathery ones by invited overseas people. Dr.Goh was very adorable,as usual. Tiny in a huge, black n blue robe with the round, artist hat. Haha...

Yi had a photo session with her family on that day. The package was quite expensive actually as compared to mine... Anyway, the desert was yummy n the whole occassion was a success. I am now an OFFICIAL GRADUATE!

EMPLOYMENT:

I am currently a probation employee in NamFatt Corporation Berhad, located in Klang (next to Am Bank, Stc Chartered Bank & Maxis). Today is my 5th day of work & there will be more days to come, at least that's wat I anticipate...

Previously, I was looking forward to work in event organizing companies but the offer came later than NF's. Just the day when I signed the employment with NF that the lady from Crystal Edge called me. She said her manager wasn't around so she had to drag 2 weeks before she could contact me. In my opinion, however, they offered some1 else and that some1 else turned down their offer. I must be like their 3rd or 4th offer I guess. My desire to work in the event organizing field was motivated by the entertainment news, mostly showed on TV. Wheneva I watch a succesful concert, I felt the urge to be there, to be apart of the team that brought the concert to its success. Alas, Galaxy didn't want me. Crystal Edge would be my stepping stone in this line but I had to forego. Probably some things are meant to be dreams & reality remains reality. Plus, I was worried that my brain couldn't handle the stress of events(due to irregular working hours). If I had the chance in the near future, I am willing to venture into that field...

So, here I am now in NF, working as a Sales & Marketing Exec. Many asked y? What has psychology got to do with this job? During interviews, it was easy to link the foreign job fields but now, based on a 5 days working experience, I haven't seen or used the application besides using psychology to adapt to the environment & getting to know people (there aren't many that I know). I was called into a meeting on Wednesday during the last minute. It was a proposal by the interior designer regarding our upcoming project. Of course, I wasn't familiar with their interior design, architect jargons. What interest me more was the behavior of the many managers in the room. Some were listening, some were on the phone, some were walking in n out... Different ways of behaving attracted my attention... I preferred observing people than to understand what interior designing was all about... Psychology roots huh?

I'm not saying that I hate my job. There are a lot of things to learn, no doubt. So far, it's still a pleasant environment. Not bad.. My manager sayang me (newbie ma... haha). A few nice n friendly colleagues (& I believe the number will increase in time).

I am still undergoing assessments by UOB. I haven't let that chance go. I would definitely not let go a better chance if I were to be offered one. At the same time also applying for Nestle & HSBC...

Another thing... THere seems to be "constant" employees leaving the company and new employees coming in. I wonder y the leaving? I remembered seeing a girl during my 2nd visit to NF & she was gone when I started work. THe other day, I heard another 1 or 2 leaving the company. Then, there are new people coming in as well... It's weird...

*I got hints that my manager probably isn't as nice as she portrays herself to be...* (No comments for now)

MAY'S BIRTHDAY:

My "lesbian" partner, dearest QIan May, is coming back this weekend to meet up with us & to celebrate her belated birthday. I suggested eating dim sum & putting the candle on either the siu mai or ha kau but she didn't want to. I suggested chee cheong fun instead... Hahaha...

Freestyle Dance Performance (Korea:PREPIX)

I love the slow shadowy movement part. Just like the Matrix... I really admire their dancing skills!